Before Pluto：Croesus，Midas，and Sardanapalus v. Menippus^注

Cr. Pluto，we can stand this snarling Cynic no longer in our neighbourhood；either you must transfer him to other quarters，or we are going to migrate.

Pl. Why，what harm does he do to your ghostly community？

Cr. Midas here，and Sardanapalus and I，can never get in a good cry over the old days of gold and luxury and treasure，but he must be laughing at us，and calling us rude names；‘slaves’ and‘garbage，’ he says we are. And then he sings；and that throws us out .—In short，he is a nuisance.

Pl. Menippus，what.s this I hear？

Me. All perfectly true，Pluto. I detest these abject rascals！ Not content with having lived the abominable lives they did，they keep on talking about it now they are dead，and harping on the good old days. I take a positive pleasure in annoying them.

Pl. Yes，but you mustn.t. They have had terrible losses；they feel it deeply.

Me. Pluto！ you are not going to lend your countenance to these whimpering fools？

Pl. It isn.t that：but I won.t have you quarrelling.

Me. Well，you scum of your respective nations，let there be no misunderstanding；I am going on just the same. Wherever you are，there shall I be also；worrying，jeering，singing you down.

Cr. Presumption！

Me. Not a bit of it. Yours was the presumption，when you expected men to fall down before you，when you trampled on men.s liberty，and forgot there was such a thing as death. Now comes the weeping and gnashing of teeth：for all is lost！

Cr. Lost！ Ah God！ My treasure?heaps.

Mid. My gold.

Sar. My little comforts.

Me. That.s right：stick to it！ You do the whining，and I.ll chime in with a string of GNOTHI?SAUTONS，best of accompaniments.

注：Pluto，中譯名普魯托，是希臘神話中的冥王。 Croesus（595 BC －約 546 BC）是古代呂底亞國王，以富有著稱。他在公元前 546 或 547 年與波斯帝王居魯士大帝的戰(zhàn)爭中被擊敗。這次戰(zhàn)役對古希臘歷史有重要影響。 Midas，中譯名邁達(dá)斯或米達(dá)斯，是小亞細(xì)亞古國佛里吉亞（Phrygia）國王。傳說酒神狄奧尼索斯賜予他金手指，即他的手指碰到的東西都會變成黃金。這就是“the golden touch”或“the Midas touch”的典故。 Sardanapalus是古代亞述國（Assyria）的最后一位國王。 Menippus，中譯名梅尼普斯，是公元前 3 世紀(jì)犬儒派哲學(xué)家，善用諷刺手法寫作。